Post by Kathleen on Jun 6, 2005 20:17:19 GMT -5
Somehow I got here.
To the person I am now.
I look back on memories, I once defined as happy moments- I was blind.
That girls mind was un discovered... Everything about her was in a bubble.
She was happy.
From the time of her birth til the end of her 14th year, she was happy.
She was.
People never told her she wasn't good enough.
The things she believed were actually lies.
The people she saw as good, were all fake.
But it wasn't them that changed.
She died.
That bubble had kept her alive but some time close to her 15th year it popped.
She lost all her air.
She's dead.
Somewhere along the way I changed.
Now people tell me I am dirt or don't care what i think.
I believe in God, without doubt- but not without questions.
People tell me I'M PULLING away from him, leaving him behind.
I should go back to church
I should pray all the time.
None of them see that relationship i have with him.. I don't pray, I just speak to him.
We're talking right now.
For once I can open up, this is someone I LOVE.
It's no physical being or angel.
Just emotion, real spirits that go beyond any of their childish believes.
It nice just to escape.
A place in which I actually feel safe.
I just wish it were enough.
God's love.
But I'm still alone.
SOmehow I got here.
To this person.
From the time I was born til the ending year of 14, I was happy, I wasn't alone- BUt It was the costume, not me, the bubble from which I broke free.
Now I'm 16, barely.
I learned so much in my 15th year, Lessons taught me how alone i truely am, My relationship with God is pure and no ones business but mine...
But somehow I still feel alone inside.
To the person I am now.
I look back on memories, I once defined as happy moments- I was blind.
That girls mind was un discovered... Everything about her was in a bubble.
She was happy.
From the time of her birth til the end of her 14th year, she was happy.
She was.
People never told her she wasn't good enough.
The things she believed were actually lies.
The people she saw as good, were all fake.
But it wasn't them that changed.
She died.
That bubble had kept her alive but some time close to her 15th year it popped.
She lost all her air.
She's dead.
Somewhere along the way I changed.
Now people tell me I am dirt or don't care what i think.
I believe in God, without doubt- but not without questions.
People tell me I'M PULLING away from him, leaving him behind.
I should go back to church
I should pray all the time.
None of them see that relationship i have with him.. I don't pray, I just speak to him.
We're talking right now.
For once I can open up, this is someone I LOVE.
It's no physical being or angel.
Just emotion, real spirits that go beyond any of their childish believes.
It nice just to escape.
A place in which I actually feel safe.
I just wish it were enough.
God's love.
But I'm still alone.
SOmehow I got here.
To this person.
From the time I was born til the ending year of 14, I was happy, I wasn't alone- BUt It was the costume, not me, the bubble from which I broke free.
Now I'm 16, barely.
I learned so much in my 15th year, Lessons taught me how alone i truely am, My relationship with God is pure and no ones business but mine...
But somehow I still feel alone inside.